국내입양인이 원가족을 찾고 있습니다

baby pic

1980년12월8일 출생 남자아이,

혈액형은 B형 태어나자마자 입양되어져서 이름을 짓지않았음,

선천적으로 천식이 있으며 낳아준 엄마를 찾고있어요.

연락처는 010-3817-9672

(This is posted on behalf of a Korean domestic adoptee searching for his family of origin, and who asked me to post.)

To rape victims and survivors: I made a mistake. I’m sorry. Please accept my apology.

First of all, I want to say thank you for visiting my blog.

I do not have time to maintenance this blog regularly anymore, but I saw many comments were in the cue because of the TV program that aired on my stalking.

Comments are moderated, and I have let them all be posted, no matter what their content. I have also received many personal emails and Facebook messages, some supportive and some not. Thank you for taking the time to write to me. I am sorry that I cannot write back to everyone because of constraints on my time and what I now recognize, thanks to the show, as my inadequate ability to emotionally deal with the stalking, even now.  I have never really had good help about it emotionally.

Despite my limitations, I would like to take time to deeply apologize to rape victims and survivors.

In the program, I was shown in the end saying something to the effect of wishing that I had been raped. Over two days and many hours of shooting, I had explained that there were no laws against stalking in Minnesota in 1990-1991. Therefore, stalking was not recognized as a crime or even something that was wrong, partly because there was no injury to my body. Moreover, I was labeled as paranoid schizophrenic by one psychiatrist, who obviously didn’t believe someone was actually stalking me. It was not an attack of paranoia or delusion. It was real. He would repeatedly come up for parole. At one time, he did get out and immediately went out and bought a shotgun. But no one recognized the reality of the situation, and no one knew how to handle it.

On the other hand, rape was recognized as real, morally wrong, a crime, and a psychologically traumatic event. My perception, perhaps wrong, was that if I had been raped, at least there would be some people who would know how to help me, at least a little. (That said, I know that rape victims are often still not treated appropriately, even now, and where you live affects how well or badly you are treated by authorities.)

What I meant to say, and what I should have said, was that I wanted my trauma to be recognized and treated appropriately.

I did not mean to diminish the pain and trauma of rape victims and survivors at all, although I can understand why one would interpret my remark as that.

I deeply apologize for this clumsy and wrong remark and regret saying it, and even more so, thinking it at all. I would like to be in solidarity with you. I do not want to be your enemy.

I am deeply sorry and regretful to the 1 in 4 American women who are raped. Please accept my deep and sincere apology. I was very, very wrong and used poor judgment (to put it politely) in trying to frame my own experience and express my feelings.  To put it impolitely, that was a really fucked up thing to say. I am very ashamed about it and deserve your reprimands.

I eagerly welcome the comments, stories, and lessons I can learn from rape victims and survivors and will post all of them. I do read my emails, so although I cannot answer all of them, you are also welcome to email me personally at jjtrenka@gmail.com.

I will count myself blessed if you would find it fit to forgive me. Thank you for being patient with me.

In peace,

Jane

(If you would like to read the legal case regarding the civil commitment of my stalker, you can click here. I am referred to as “J.V.”)

Back from phishing trip (I’m OK)

Greetings from Seoul!

Over the past couple of weeks, my email and Facebook accounts were used in a very malicious phishing scheme. It is taking me some time to recover from this.

My one and only email address is jjtrenka@gmail.com. If you get emails from any other email address, including “jjtrrenka@yahoo.com,” it is NOT ME. I have also temporarily disabled my Facebook account and am working to recover it.

It’s taking me some time to get back on top of things, so please understand if I cannot respond to you right away. Especially if you are someone that I talk with only on Facebook, please understand, as I cannot see your messages right now!

Thank you from Real Jane

Too lazy to blog

I found out that I can destroy my attention span better with Facebook than anything else. So please send me a friend request under my name, Jane Jeong Trenka.

You can also find my little organization that could, Truth and Reconciliation for the Adoption Community of Korea (TRACK), at www.adoptionjustice.com and on Facebook.

See you there :)

Public notice to young researchers, artists, and journalists

I can’t believe I need to say this, but I guess I do because the situation of disrespect has been getting progressively worse over the past few years, and this weekend I just about lost my shit.

Public notice: If you are someone who is coming to Korea to interview, study, or make an art project out of people here, treat us with the same respect as you would anyone else. Think about your white neighbor, for instance. You understand and treat your white neighbor as a human being with thoughts, feelings, and dignity — as opposed to the zoo animals that some people seem to think we are. We are human beings too.

Basic courtesy: 1. Write a letter of introduction. Write it in a language that the people can understand. If their language is Korean, it is your responsibility to get it translated. If you cannot translate it yourself, hire someone to do it for you. You would not expect your white neighbor to read a letter in Korean.

2. Arrange mutually convenient dates to work together, if people agree to work with you. Do not just show up whenever is convenient for you, with your deadline, and expect your white neighbor or anyone in Korea to suddenly drop all what they’re doing so they can help you with your project. People actually have things that they are already doing. Like going to work. Don’t come here and say, “Well I only have two weeks and so I need to meet you before next Thursday.” Maybe we are busy until Friday. Contact people before you buy your plane ticket.

3. When you get here, do not just show up at someone’s house, meeting, or workplace. Contact them first and ask permission to come. If a stranger just showed up randomly on your white neighbor’s porch, he would slam the door in their face and say, “Sorry, not interested.”

4. Be prepared to convince people about why they should participate in your project. Convince us that we should work with you. Tell us what you are doing and why. Show us work samples so we can make an informed decision.

5. We are more likely to want to work with you if you are working in solidarity with us. Are you going to stick around for awhile and make a friendship and build trust with us? Are you going to support our work through yours in some way? If so, we are more likely to want to cooperate with you. If you have learned something about what we are doing before you even contact us by reading on the internet or reading books, etc., we can tell how much you have learned by your attitude. If you have done your homework, we are more likely to want to work with you because you have shown that you are already caring enough to take the time to learn. Do not expect us to use our precious time to explain everything to you from square one. If you are here for a quick trip to just take what you need for your personal gain and then leave, why would we (or your white neighbor) want to give you the time of day?

In addition, people who work on a volunteer basis in Korea are working ON A VOLUNTEER BASIS. Volunteers get to do only what they want to because they are not paid to do anything. We are doing activist work out of our convictions. We are usually happy to help out when we feel that your work aligns nicely with our convictions and our activism. If you have a great track record and you come well-prepared, people will probably fall all over themselves to help you.

However, if you have come to Korea in a completely ignorant state or with an attitude that Koreans do not deserve the same respectful treatment as your white neighbor, then don’t expect volunteers to use their precious and limited time to help you do anything, and don’t expect us to open any doors that will enable you to exploit our friends.

Lesson: Do your homework. Use common courtesy. Then everything will work out fine.

Video

제인 정 트렌카, 「덧없는 환영들」 중에서

From the Korean edition of “Fugitive Visions.” Thank you, Mun Jang!

Police web site for missing people

신경하

Missing girl, 4 years old at the time. Now 42 years old.

Date of birth: July 25, 1970

Date of disappearance: May 9, 1975 

She said she was going to her grandmother’s house, and then she disappeared.

Somebody asked me if there is a web site in Korea for missing people. I still haven’t found an efficient way to post all of the listings of children who I think may have been adopted overseas, but you can use these links to look through the web site yourself.

Here are the listings for people that disappeared. Families are searching for them.

Here are the listings for individuals who have been found somewhere in Korea, and the authorities are trying to find their families.

 Here is the homepage, including an English menu. You can find applications for overseas adoptees and DNA there. I am not sure how well they respond to English requests on this site; I have no experience with this web site.

May all your wishes come true in the New Year.